Sunday, June 20, 2010

Making The Best Of Any Situation

So I know I was a little frazzled last week (missed it? check here). Thanks for sticking with me. I appreciate all the comments and advice.

I have calmed down and decided to make the best of the situation. Cause really what else is there to do?

Maybe it will be fun planning stuff with Blondie.

With that said I made a few frantic calls last week securing in some details; afraid that some vendors may not want to work weddings two weekends in a row. I had done the research and had my first choices already selected. Just need to finalize the details.

I booked a photographer.

Double checked with the carter.

And confirmed with the DJ.

The only thing left I really needed to do was pick bridesmaids. This is the one part of the wedding I have stressed the most about. How can I possibly pick between my friends? I am close to them all in different ways. I love them all -- how was I to choose?

Well I came to a solution.

I wasn't going to choose. They were.

Perhaps it was unorthodox but I found myself last night typing an email to my nine close friends (Giggles, Vixen, Vivi, Hollywood, Babbles, Conscious, Nurse Betty, LC and Blondie).

I would sum it up but instead I'll just let you read the email:

Hi Everybody,

Ok so I'm sorry to send this in an email but I wanted to ask you all at one time and all of us being together at one time is a little difficult! 

The most difficult decision I have had when figuring out wedding details is picking bridesmaids. So I'm asking you to do it for me!! You are all my closest friends and there is no way I can choose between you. At the same time I know a lot goes in to being a bridesmaid - time as well as money. And it will not hurt my feelings one bit if some of you cannot be bridesmaids. I UNDERSTAND!!! There are other things I will need help with that day if you would like to be involved but not a bridesmaids. Or if you want to just show up and have fun and drink I'm cool with that to :) 

I can't really afford to pay for everyones dresses and I understand that money is tight with everyone now so I don't want to ask you and you say yes out of obligation but feel you can't really afford. Plus I know right now we are all at different places in our lives and that some of you may have to many other obligations. And I'm ok with that. It will not hurt my feelings one bit!! I promise!! :) Like I said though I love you all and there is no way I can choose between you.

Attached are the two bridesmaids dresses you can choose between if you do want to be one they are both $135. I know that is a lot and like I said I completely understand either way :) 

Love you all and look forward to hearing from you!!

PS I know this is not normal. But you all know I'm not normal :)

As soon as I hit send I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

I didn't want anyones feelings hurt if I didn't ask them, nor did I want to ask someone to be in it that really didn't want to be. Plus I know its expensive. And I meant it that my feelings won't be hurt either way.

Vixen frantically asks me what if everyone says yes?

I tell her that I will be thankful, honored and blessed to have my best friends in my wedding.

Still frantic she asks, "Does Marine have that many groomsman?"

"Probably not." I answer honestly.

"Well what will you do then?"

"Make it work. They don't have to match." I reply much to her horror I think.

I'm over stressing. I want our wedding to be beautiful - yet fun and relaxing. I can't control everything. Things will go wrong, I'm sure. But I'm happy knowing that day that I will marry Marine. Nothing else matters.

I'm ok with having uneven numbers. Two Bridesmaids per Groomsman. Doubt anyone will mind.

Sometimes things have to be a little imperfect for them to be perfect.


phoebe said...

beautiful dresses.... and they look like they can be worn again! woooo.

good for you for just plowing on through. yay!

Date Girl said...

This was tough for Match and I too. We have tons of different friends in different groups and didn't want to choose between them. So we didn't. We chose to have no bridal party. And let me tell you, my friends have totally stepped up to the bridesmaids roles in spite of not standing up with us. I think they're grateful not to have to buy matching dresses and all that stuff.

I think you approached it the right way though-just let them decide if it's something they want to do. I agree with Phoebs, those dresses are darling and can definitely be worn again. Black is always in style!

Priscilla said...

Great dresses! Those are the exact dresses my friend picked out for her wedding. They are comfortable and can wear them again. Score! I picked the bottom dress. :)